When you learn how to wield a power like the law of attraction, you realize that you are in control. You get to set the tone of your own reality.
Or at least, that’s ideally what would happen. Unfortunately, all too many people I meet with still have this mentality of life happening to them. Life becomes out of control, totally opposed to what they want life to look like.
It’s a tricky thing. To those new to these principles, life can certainly seem unpredictable and out of our control. And indeed, I’ve said many times that as long as the ego is the one trying to control life, it won’t work.
But once you’re able to step into your true Self, and live from that perspective, then you start to see that life begins and ends with you. You are the creator and the experiencer of life.
The question is, how do you step into your role as creator?
Stop Reacting to Life
When you react to life, you are giving away your own power.
What exactly do I mean by “react”? I mean that when unwanted experiences happen in life, you react emotionally.
Imagine that you get an unexpected bill in the mail. Reacting to life means that you panic, become anxious, or get angry at your situation.
These seem like perfectly reasonable responses, right? And indeed, I wouldn’t blame you for having them.
But you have to understand something about emotions. I’ve said before that emotions are the language of the Universe. You teach the Universe what to give you more of by the emotions that you focus on.
So, when you react to that unexpected bill with anxiety, you are teaching the Universe to bring you more things that cause anxiety.
Not only this, but when you react with anxiety to this situation, you are also training your subconscious mind to react with anxiety every time you find yourself in similar situations, which makes it easier and easier to create more situations like this.
It’s easy to see that you can quickly find yourself in a bit of a perpetual cycle of lack.
To take another example, say that your crush rejects you. You feel hurt, perhaps even worthless.
Just as above, if you allow these negative emotions to fester, you’ll soon find yourself attracting more situations like this.
Now think about how many experiences in your everyday life you have a negative emotional reaction to. Perhaps someone cuts you off in traffic, you are called by a bill collector, your boss annoys you, and the list goes on.
No, maybe you’re not focusing a lot on these emotions, but we all know how quickly our day can go from fine to downright terrible just with a few frustrating events. Each negative experience just adds a bit more to the overall balance of negativity. And, the more you allow that negative balance to grow, the more you attract these unwanted experiences.
As I said, this is how most people are living life, unfortunately.
If you’re among them, then how do you change it?
End Your War with Life
After a while, this reactive posture creates a defensive attitude within us.
I find that most people who have this reactive posture also have a deep mistrust of life.
Of course, this mistrust stems from the ego. The ego believes in lack and separation. It believes that life can hurt you, and so it is at war with life.
But, the more you are at war with life, the more you create whatever life brings you. When you resist what is, you get more of what is.
There’s simply no such thing as saying “no” to life, or a part of life. When something unwanted happens and you say “no” to that thing with your focus and your negative emotions, you are saying “yes” to more of that.
The only casualty in your war against life is your own idea of the reality you want to create. As long as you are at war with life, you simply cannot create the reality you desire.
I know some people might say that life is cruel, and so of course they would resist it.
But, it’s a catch-22. As I said, the more you resist it, the more you create it. You can’t wait for life to get better, before you stop resisting it. You have to be the one to act first.
Life is just a mirror of whatever you are holding within. The mirror can’t do anything but reflect. If you don’t like what’s in the mirror, you can’t argue with the mirror. I mean, you could, but it’d be futile. Instead, you have to change that which is being reflected.
Most people are going around arguing with the mirror. They don’t like what they see, so they argue more and more insistently, which makes the reflection more and more of the unwanted.
Then they say they won’t stop arguing until the mirror stops showing them an unwanted reflection.
Do you see why this is ineffective?
You Are Life
Being at war with life sets up a duality between the ego and the rest of life. But, you are life itself. You are part of the Universal Flow. When you deny life, you are denying a part of yourself.
You see, the law of attraction is not about forcing your idea of reality onto life. It is about becoming the flow, and gently suggesting your creation to that flow. Because, your desire is part of that flow. There is no need for it to be at odds with it.
This is what I mean when I talk about living from the true Self. Become part of that flow, and allow your desire to naturally take form in your reality.
You never have to be against life. The very idea of being against life is going to set up resistance, which will only create unwanted experiences.
As long as you give up that resistance, life will support you. It’s actually quite beautiful how the Universe will support you, once you stop resisting it. It is meant to support your every need and desire.
But, that cannot be part of your experience until you take the first step and actually surrender to the flow of life.
Surrendering to the flow does not mean losing control. It does not mean giving up all of your desires. It does not mean you don’t want life to be a certain way.
It means allowing the Universe to do 99% of the work, as it was meant to. Your job is to create, and that is it.
It means being okay no matter what happens, because you know that the Universe is supporting you fully.
It means simply letting go and allowing, because you know that life is inherently friendly.
Setting the Tone of Life
You get to set the tone. You get to create whatever it is that you want, provided you don’t resist what is here already.
How do you actually do that? How do you stop reacting, and proactively create the kind of life you want?
It comes by deliberate use of the emotions.
As I said, the emotions are the language of the Universe. When you allow life to dictate what emotions you will feel, you give up your creative power.
By no means am I saying to demonize your negative emotions. Resisting them would just create more of the same.
What I’m saying is that you have control over whether you continue to experience them or not. By completely accepting them for what they are, and then gently shifting your focus to something better, you create reality as you want it to be.
It’s a bit complicated, so I’ll return to the two examples I used earlier.
Imagine you get that unexpected bill in the mail. Initially, you feel panicked and anxious.
Realizing that this will only create more of what you don’t want, you know that you must find a way to change it. However, to reject or resist the feeling will only make it last even longer.
So, you accept that this feeling is here right now. You even surrender to the feeling, because you realize that it is just stuck energy wanting to be expressed.
As the feeling alleviates, you decide what you will focus on instead.
You decide that you’d like to focus on the reality where you have plenty of money to meet this unexpected expense. Since there must be a parallel reality where your desire is true, you know that it is possible.
So, you simply enter the feeling state of having more than enough money. Every time your thoughts wander to worrying about this bill, you gently redirect them to this new reality you’d rather create.
The more you do so, the more you train your subconscious mind to react in a similar way in situations like this one, and the more you teach the Universe that you want a reality where there is plenty of money to meet all expenses.
You see, you fully accepted the negative emotion, allowing that energy to vent. Then, you used the power of your emotions to enter the state of abundance, in order to create more of that reality.
Let’s take the example of your crush rejecting you. As a result, you feel rejected and worthless.
- You allow those feelings to express themselves
- You choose a reality where you meet your perfect partner
- You feel that feeling of love and being loved
- You redirect your thoughts to that reality whenever they venture to the unwanted reality
Do you see what is happening? You are not allowing life to dictate how you will feel. You decide how you want to feel, and life reflects that right back to you. If you feel abundant, life will reflect back abundance. If you feel loved, life will reflect back to you love.
But, it all has to start with you. You have to set the tone of your reality, by feeling the way you want to feel, and the way you want life to inspire you to feel through your experiences.
That is your power. This is all you have to do. The details are left up to the Universe, because that simply isn’t your job. Just feel the way you want to feel, and that will set the Universal Flow into motion to create more experiences like that.
Develop Awareness of Your Inner State
With the above in mind, you’ll see the importance of having a constant mindfulness of your inner state. Any time your state starts to dip into the negative, you’ll immediately become aware that you are creating more negative experiences in your life.
Plus, when you catch it early, it is much easier to let go and redirect to what you’d rather be feeling.
This is not just to do with your specific manifestations. Your inner state is creating your reality moment-by-moment, not just when you are doing LOA techniques. This is a 24×7 way of life.
I recommend, from the moment you awake, simply doing an inner inventory, so to speak. Ask yourself, “How do I feel right now?” Check if there is any hint of a negative state within you.
I imagine it as a spectrum, ranging from 100% negative and 0% positive, to 100% positive and 0% negative. I might ask myself, “How negative is my state at this moment?” If it is, say, 20% negative, I will work on releasing it, often by simply noticing the existence of that negativity, and letting it go.
The goal is to get to as close to 0% negative as possible. If you are still working through a lot of resistance in your everyday life, this might not be feasible for you, and that is okay. Even just being aware of your state at any given moment will do much to help you change it. But, do not beat up yourself if you can’t do it perfectly on day 1. This is a process.
Do the same thing as you go throughout your day. If something happens that triggers a negative state, do the above to return to equilibrium.
The important thing to realize is that your emotional state is vital. Carrying around a negative state is like running your car on empty. Perhaps you can ignore it for a while, but eventually, it’ll make itself known to you, probably in not such a pleasant way.
But, many of us treat our emotional state as incidental to life, not as the central part of the creation process that it is. Put prime importance on how you feel at any moment, and you will quickly see your life improving.
It’s all about being deliberate. Make the decision now to be more deliberate about your emotional state. Only then will you begin to get predictable results with the law of attraction. You will then have become a deliberate creator, no longer the reactor to life that you once were.
How About You?
Now it’s your turn. How proactive are you in life? Do you deliberately choose to create, or do you simply react to what life brings your way? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.