I've had the intention lately of learning how to manifest big desires. I don't just mean what I've previously called next level goals, which are goals that are relatively within your realm of belief, but I mean truly big goals that would seem nearly impossible to you now.
And as always happens, as I explore this new, uncharted territory for me, the Universe has shown me much more about how it all fits together.
And so what I've seen is that there are two general ways to use the law of attraction: what we could call the path of ego, and the path of spirit.
The path of ego is forceful. It advocates pushing to get ahead. Those who follow this path experience intense pressure to succeed.
The path of spirit, on the other hand, follows the Taoist principle of wu-wei (non-doing). Those on this path believe that nothing truly good or useful comes from using force to get ahead.
Which path you choose is your choice, but in this post, I'll describe both paths, and why I believe the path of spirit is far better in the long-run.
Note: This is a long post. But, I would strongly encourage you to read the whole thing, as I believe it'll totally transform your view of the law of attraction.
The Path of Ego
The way that most people try to practice the law of attraction is by focusing as much as possible on positive thoughts and feelings. It is said that the more you focus on the positive, the more you will get the positive.
And so when resistance comes up, or doubts, or fears, the common advice is to distract oneself. Try to feel good about anything in general, even by watching cat videos, and you'll have refocused your attention on the positive.
Now the topic of “feeling good” is another post entirely, but suffice it to say that this advice is way over-simplistic, and has gotten many, many people into worse situations by trying to follow that advice.
But, what we're interested in here is the strategy of ignoring resistance and just focusing on the positive.
Why do people on this path want to ignore the negative thoughts as much as possible?
It's because they are afraid that if they focus on the negative thoughts, then negative manifestations will result, and they won't get their desire.
So they do their best to only allow those positive thoughts to pass through.
But what do you think happens to their overall vibration when they are avoiding such negative thoughts?
By fearing not getting the desire, they are holding in mind not getting the desire, even if in a subtle, subconscious way, and therefore they often don't get it.
I'm not saying that this path never works. It obviously does, or no one would be saying that they got results.
But, it only works for certain types of desires.
Specifically, the bigger the desire, the less likely this strategy will work.
First let's take desires that have nearly no attachment at all. You want to find a parking space, or you want to manifest $20. There's no real attachment, because it doesn't matter so much to you if it doesn't happen.
Nearly everyone can effortlessly manifest these sorts of things, because there are really no negative thoughts to avoid.
Now let's take something a bit larger. Let's say you want to get a new job. You know you can, eventually, but you want to get it soon, and at a place you would enjoy working.
Now, the stakes are higher with this type of desire. Failure would represent more in this situation, and there is more of an attachment to it working out.
With this type of desire, the success rate goes down significantly. I'd hazard a guess that roughly 30-40% of deliberate manifestors can manifest such a thing. This is a totally unscientific guess, just based on my own observation.
Those who succeed have a particular ability to keep their mind focused on the positive. They regularly use affirmations and visualizations to keep their mind focused where they want it to be. Perhaps they often have doubts, but they don't get paralyzed by them.
Now let's take a truly large goal, such as making a million dollars, or taking your business to 6 figures.
I'd guess that only about 2% of deliberate manifestors can manifest such a large goal. I've seen it happen, but it's rare enough that such stories act as inspiration for the majority of others who have never manifested such a thing.
It's very rare that someone on the path of ego can manifest this type of goal. If you tried, you'd be so overcome by doubts and insecurities that you'd never get there.
Why the Path of Ego Doesn't Work
So again, the bigger the goal, the more the success rate decreases.
But what is the reason behind such failure?
I already said above that when trying to escape negative thoughts, you often just hold the lack of your desire in mind, and so you don't manifest it.
But what's the underlying reason behind this, that causes most followers of this path to fail at any significant manifestation?
First, I'll tell you that I followed this path for quite a while. Well, more accurately, I think I followed a sort of mix of this path, and the path of spirit. But, my ego was definitely involved.
Once I started having regular success with the law of attraction sometime in mid-2016, my ego wanted to go full steam ahead and manifest everything I had wanted to.
I manifested greater wealth, plus some other nice experiences.
And I was 100% engaged in those desires. Often I had doubts, but my persistence was the deciding factor.
But as I said in the introduction to this post, recently I've been looking to take it way further than ever before.
I realized that one cannot have massive success by taking linear steps.
But I also realized that as I reached for these much larger goals, that the ego would get in the way. It could somewhat believe the more manageable goals I had achieved before, but these bigger ones were just too much.
It started when I took the Become Limitless course from MindValley. Vishen Lakhiani, the teacher of that course, emphasized that to reach truly large goals, you had to have two things:
- Happiness in the now
- A vision for the future
I realized that I had tons of vision for the future. But, I didn't have so much happiness in the now. I was working a job that I disliked, and I was just focused on how to achieve that next step.
So I started seeking for ways to be happy now. I started with meditation, which definitely helped, but I still had that ego desire that wouldn't let up, and which was robbing me of present happiness.
And so it was around this time I realized the limitation of the path of ego: it's almost entirely based on lack.
The ego believes that we are lacking something, and this is why we desire the things we desire.
We believe that if we get that money, or have that relationship, or get hired for that job, we will be happy.
So happiness is pushed off to the future.
And every time we get one of those goals, we still don't allow ourselves to be happy, because there's something more we want.
And so we get on this treadmill of seeking, and seeking, and seeking… but never finding.
To be sure, it is possible to be hugely successful on the path of ego. But from all the stories I've read from those who did exactly that, it only leads to greater and greater unhappiness.
Those on the path of ego are always running from the negative, and so they allow the negative to control their lives from the background. And then they wonder why they aren't having the success they so crave.
It's exactly because they crave it. They lack it, and need the Universe to give it to them. But of course it never will—or if it does, only wrapped in a package of suffering.
Discovering the Path of Spirit
About 3 years ago, before even dreaming of starting Co-Creation Coaching, I had a massive spiritual awakening.
For the next 9 months or so, there was simply no “I”. I can still get to that place at will, and honestly, I believe it is the reason for the success I have had.
But I realized something much later. For those roughly 9 months or so, we had more money than we knew what to do with.
Okay, so at that time, it was largely coming through Christine, who was working full time. But I'm the one that manages all of our combined income, so it was my manifestation, too.
I remember thinking at that time, “There's so much money here I don't know what to do with it all.”
And funnily enough, it was less than what we're making now, so that's an odd thought. 😛
But the point is, that abundance was effortless. Christine enjoyed the work she was doing, and money was just coming in, perhaps for the first time ever for us.
And also for the first time, I just didn't care. Remember I was in a place of total non-attachment, so the money could come, or it could go, and it just didn't matter.
And Christine has never really cared about money, so she wasn't blocking it, either.
Now here's the funny part (trust me, not at the time though): after a while, I started caring about the money. And, within a few weeks, Christine lost her job, because the agency she was working for had shut down.
So then, for about 2 months, until SSI could kick back in, we had to live on our savings. Suddenly, I knew exactly what to do with that money: it all got used up on living expenses.
After that, I was always searching for ways of getting back to that previous level of abundance. But, it would take me another year and a half to manage it.
But what I got out of that experience was that when I was totally detached from the goal, it flooded into my life literally effortlessly.
Later, I learned how to achieve relative abundance while being attached, but then I realized that this method is limited. I could only go so far on this path.
As I called out to the Universe to show me a way to achieve truly great success, in a way that wouldn't take forever, I was shown this truth: That which you lack, you cannot be given. That which you have already, will flow abundantly.
Back to Square One
The course that got me started on all this, which I still use to this day, was Hypnosis and the Law of Attraction by Joe Tabbanella. In fact, I still stay in contact with Joe regularly, and I've referred several people to this course.
Anyway, I revisited that course recently, as I do every so often. And I realized that there was part of his teaching which I was totally ignoring.
Specifically, he says that you have to get to the point of just not caring either way, because you have the goal internally.
Okay, so I knew he taught that, but back in 2015 when I took his course, that was the last thing I wanted to hear. And in 2016, when I took it again, it was still the last thing I wanted to hear.
So hey, I found a way around it, sort of. I wasn't willing to drop my desires, so I manifested a good deal of success while circumventing that particular teaching.
Everything else I've followed to the letter, except that one bit of advice.
Except, now I realize it was actually the most important piece of advice that he gave in the entire course.
Get to the point where you have the desire internally, so that you just don't care if you have it externally or not. And then, you'll have it.
That's exactly what I inadvertently put into practice three years ago when I had that effortless abundance.
And the thing is, as I study more LOA teachers that I actually trust, who actually know what they're talking about, I see the same themes.
See, I've been going on a bit of a course binge lately. Prior to about a year ago, I couldn't afford many of the courses I wanted to take, so I could only extend my knowledge through books, and personal experience. Most books on the law of attraction are frankly useless, so it was down to personal experience.
But if you look in the right place, there are several teachers who really know what they're talking about. Joe's one of them. David Snyder is another. And the third, which I'll mention more below, is Lester Levenson, along with Larry Crane.
Anyway, here are the major themes I found in common between all good teachers of the LOA:
- You must let go of anything that conflicts with the vision of what you want. That means, diving into the resistance and letting it go entirely.
- You must get to the point where you don't need the desire, but you have it already.
- You must take on the consciousness of the goal, so that you become that vision so entirely that you no longer lack it.
So, these teachers say to (1) fearlessly face your resistance and release it entirely, (2) drop all needing or attachment to the vision, so you don't even care if you get it externally, and (3) take on the consciousness of that vision so entirely that you can no longer say you lack it.
I've always done point #1, and even often point #3. But for two years, I've been terrified of point #2.
However, it's that point that really takes things to the next level, and literally makes anything possible.
And, when that is in place, then you can also have happiness in the now. Your goals won't rob you of experiencing happiness in this very moment.
How to Follow the Path of Spirit
So why is this called the path of spirit?
Instead of answering that directly, I'd like to show you experientially.
But first, let me ask you a simple question: Why do you want what you want, beneath the ego-level concerns?
Because once you drop those ego desires, or the belief that you lack anything now, what you're left with is, well, simple intention from the level of your soul.
The soul can't really desire, as we know ego desire to be. It more simply decides, or intends. But it never lacks anything.
I can show you that experience right now. If you try this exercise, it can be extremely transformative, so please take the time to try it out for yourself.
Either read the instructions below, or you can enter your email below to receive a free recording of me guiding you through the exercise.
Please bring your desire to mind. Just for illustration purposes, let's
say that you want a new job.
Why do you want that job? Perhaps you want the better pay, the enjoyable work environment, and even just the knowledge that you have a great job.
And none of those are bad things, obviously. But by wanting that, your ego believes that you lack those things now, or the deeper desires that they fulfill.
All desires come from three basic wants: the want of approval, the want of control, and the want of safety or security.
Having the greater pay might give you a greater sense of security. Having the enjoyable work environment might give you a greater sense of control. And that sense of having a great job would give you approval, both from yourself, and from others.
But all of those wants are things that you can have now.
So let's say you drop those wants. This job can no longer provide that, because you already have approval, control, and safety.
So now why do you want it?
Before moving on, here are the steps so you can try it out yourself:
- Bring your desire to mind.
- Ask yourself, “Why do I want this goal?”
- Whatever thought or feeling comes up first, determine whether it comes from wanting approval, wanting control, or wanting to be safe.
- Just allow yourself to let go of the “wanting” until you feel you have approval, control, or safety with no lack feeling.
- Ask yourself again, “Why do I want this goal?”
- Repeat steps 3-5 until nothing else comes up.
For step 6 above, even if you get a feeling, like excitement or happiness, still repeat steps 3-5 until nothing more comes up.
So now, why do you want your goal?
When I do this exercise, there are no thoughts to answer. There aren't even any feelings, because I released all of those.
There's just a soul-level knowingness—a choice to have this goal for no other reason than just to have it.
But that knowingness is not lack. You'll be happy if you get it, and you'll be happy if you don't. But, you still choose to have it.
This is why I call this the path of spirit. Your desire transcends ego, and becomes a soul-level intention.
To follow the path of spirit, then, you simply need to remove any ego-level lack or neediness, until you're simply left with the pure knowingness of spirit.
Notice that we're not running away from resistance, or trying to distract ourselves with funny cat videos.
If you ignore the egoic lack, it still exists, just under the surface, where it is still doing damage and holding away your goal.
So we dive in, bringing up every possible feeling of lack and want that we can find, and letting it all go, until all that's left is the vast ocean of Beingness.
You won't get it all in one day. You may not even get it all in a week.
But if you do this daily, you will little-by-little release everything that is holding you from your goal. And when that is done, your goal will simply fall into your lap, often suddenly and unexpectedly.
The Importance of Letting Go
I wrote a good bit on the Release Technique last year, which is the same technique the above exercise is based on.
The Release Technique was founded by Lester Levenson, whose story is quite inspirational and I recommend going to read about it. You can read more info here, or get the book, [thirstylink ids="9735"]No Attachments, No Aversions[/thirstylink] by Lester Levenson.
However, at the time, I didn't experience much progress. I think it was largely because, again, I really didn't want to drop my desire entirely, so I tried to hold on to that while doing the process, which really doesn't work.
So look, I'll say this: it took me two years to realize the importance of dropping all need for the desire. That refusal to drop the attachment resulted in a lot of struggle, which I wouldn't recommend duplicating. 🙂
It's not that you can't have the desire. It's that the desire has to be coming from the right place: your soul. If it is coming from your ego, then you are stuck. Even if you get it, you won't be any happier, and you'll want something more, because you still have the feeling of lacking the very same things as before.
So get rid of the lack, then have the desire.
As I said above, Joe Tabbanella gave the same advice, all of two years ago when I first took his course, but I didn't want to listen to that, either.
But for him, it was that state of not caring that got him his very first manifestation at the age of 19, and every manifestation from then on once he figured out what he had done to get those results.
But see, I used to think that if I dropped my need for the desire, I wouldn't get it.
But I recently heard Larry Crane (the person who teaches the Release Technique now), on a call talking to someone who was working on releasing a money issue.
The caller said that they felt totally released about the money.
And so Larry asked, “So is it in your pocket?” And the caller said no.
And so Larry said, “So you're not released on it. If you were, it'd be in your pocket.”
So it's not something where if you let go, the Universe will give it to you if it feels like it. No, if you totally let go, you'll have it, or something better. That's a guarantee.
Remember, I'm all about results. I've said before, and I'll say again, you're here to get results, and so I'll help you get results.
But to get those results, you have to totally drop the egoic desire for them, until you're just left with the soul knowing.
To get the results, you have to totally be okay as you are right now, without those results. Then, they will fall into your lap, easily and effortlessly.
Within two days of just starting to apply this technique, I made over $1,200. It was quite literally effortless.
You can have the same effortless results, if you let go and choose to be free, now.
If you want help with that, I invite you to schedule a free 20-minute strategy session with me, and I'll be happy to help you clear the blocks to your biggest goals in life.
How About You?
Now it's your turn. Are you hanging on to your desires? What might be left over if you were to drop all those egoic desires? Let me know in the comments.